TRUE LIFE STORY: ABDUL THE SUPERMAN

I remember the first time I saw Abdul. It had been a stressful morning organizing the orientation program for Fulbright scholars at the University of Washington. Quite frankly, I woke up on the wrong side of the bed that morning. But it didn't matter because I was going to meet Abdul, a Fulbright scholar from Nigeria. The first Nigerian I had seen in months.

It was over 30 minutes after we had checked in other students for orientation and Abdul had not shown up. He was late, just like I had been that morning. And I wasn't surprised. Abdul had flown in straight from Nigeria. I remember when he first strolled into the orientation lobby in his purple native attire, traditional cap and bag pack, I smiled. There was no doubt he was a proud Northern man. Of course, the others couldn't tell the difference but I could. Although he was tense, he smiled at me. The first thing he said, "You look Nigerian" . I smiled back. "I am,  nice to meet you". " Oh...my sister", we began to laugh. I could tell I eased his tension. Out here, he quickly learned we didn't have the privilege of tribal sentiments. To the white man, we were just African.

In a few hours, he brought me up to speed...

Abdul is a Veterinary doctor from Northern Nigeria and a passionate lecturer.  As part of his research, he is one of the few or only people in Africa to induce stroke in a rat and cure it. I listened as he went on about his research. Amazing! He was not born with a silver spoon. Actually, he was born with no spoon. He told me how he sponsored himself through a Nigerian school. How he eventually became a lecturer in the same school. How he began his research and how he took a loan of millions to fund his research.  

But that was not all. Abdul told me about his love for football and how he was a referee. He told me he used the money to run an NGO which rehabilitated "Area boys". I was in awe. These were boys who politicians had blessed with machetes and weed and turned into terrorist. Abdul was recruiting them to play football and refocus their youthful exuberance. He was trying to help young boys. But that was not all. Abdul told me about the "Amajiri" boy by his house. The boy who never went to school but listened to other kids when they returned and chanted their "States and capital". How one day he heard the boy chanting his "States and capital" and how the boy thought the capital of Bayelsa was "in a zuwa".😂 How since then, he is now currently sponsoring the boy through school. He told me about Ify who he  is sponsoring to write jamb a second time. The stories went on and on.

"Abdul do you want to remain here", I had to ask. "I can't, if I do, my people will die. All the people depending on me will die. That boy will never make it through school. And Ify will never be a nurse. I'm doing this so I can make a way for them. So they can come here and be better. Our leaders have failed us and we are the only hope of Nigeria. We, the community. It is the children of the poor whose lives our country has ruined that will ruin own children lives if we don't help them. I don't ever want to leave my state or my school. I want to give back."

I was shocked. Is this one Jesus or what? Abdul didn't do anything for accolades. Actually no one recognized him in Nigeria. But even in seeming obscurity, he served his people. It was reminder that when you consistently serve people like Abdul, you never have to look for recognition on social media or any platform. It will find you. Your life should be a platform for other people. So at 2:00 am I rushed to ink him down. I had to make sure I don't forget that

Abdul, the lecturer; 

Abdul the researcher who had independently induced stroke in a rat and cured it

was Superman

And I couldn't be more proud to be Nigerian.💜

Ps: The Picture is not Abdul. lol.

THE BOSS FOR ALL SEASONS

“My friend DDD called me yesterday. He told me that he was going through applications for employment sent to his firm and he came across one from one of my lawyers, one Zontong…”

My heart sank as my Boss said those words. I froze. So many questions raced through my mind that second ‘Why didn’t I tell my Boss before I applied for that job?’ ‘What was his response to Mr DDD?’ ‘What if he doesn’t really want me to leave?’ 

Ahhhhh he will sack me! It’s me that did myself o! 

“...I told him I knew about your application and he should give you the job… and that you have my blessings… I even told him I will come to Abuja to see him next week…” – these were the major things I picked from what Boss said afterwards.

Eh? I was numb and didn’t know what to say. Should I apologise for not telling him about this application? Should I just say thank you and leave? That was my dilemma that Wednesday afternoon in September. I was on leave (yes, lawyers too go on leave) and I came around the office to say hi to my colleagues.

I first met my Boss, a brilliant, excellent yet extremely humble lawyer in 2014 when I got an internship position in his firm, perhaps the busiest and best litigation firm in Jos. Very quiet and unassuming, he immediately became a model and all I wanted from that moment was to be like him. Fast forward to sometime in 2016, I was back to the firm after my Bar Part II at the Nigerian Law School and there he confirmed and encouraged what was then, just a desire – he showed me that I can be more than what Jos could offer. He showed me that to beat the competition ahead, I need to think bigger, aim higher, be better. 

My starting point was supposed to be my NYSC service year. I was posted to Gombe State and for a young ambitious lawyer, you could imagine the disappointment. Well, I didn’t seek redeployment. My Boss to the rescue, he ensured I didn’t waste away on the benches of the Ministry of Justice like most Corpers and got me a place in a good firm in Gombe. I concluded my service in December 2017, and before then, like every career driven person, I had packaged my job application and sent to a number of law firms, mostly in Lagos and Abuja. As usual, very few did anything more than the computer generated response to my application.

So there I was, back to the office in Jos in January 2018 to seek employment. Well, it was not as if I had any option. I couldn’t just pack my bags up and leave for Lagos or Abuja as was suggested by some friends. Those were extremely difficult times for me. The doubt, the fear, the cluelessness and confusion. I still get a shiver every time I think of me this time last year.  

Well, like a father receiving a son whose dreams were short-lived, he took me in but not without first reminding me of my conviction before I left. I never forgot, but until then, I knew my new conviction must be to keep working and remain faithful where God is nursing me right now while I wait for him to take me to where he’s planning to plant me. My Boss runs a mid-sized law firm and gets to work with everyone directly. Somehow, God granted me favour and I got access to every job, every task, and every brief. A junior couldn’t ask for more. And I loved and committed myself to every bit of it.

This led us to that conversation in September 2018. One of my application is finally yielding fruit at a time when my Boss has become my mentor and father. True to that father status, he followed up on my application until I was called and sat for the firm’s test and interview. I got to know at my last interview session with Mr DDD that although I passed the interview, I was not among the 10 highly qualified lawyers interviewed for the position. But I had what the rest did not - a glowing personal recommendation from my Boss on my person, my work ethic and prospects. I GOT THE JOB and I have since had an exciting 7 weeks with the firm before the December holidays.

As I meditate on my wins and losses for 2018, I cannot help but to thank God for the gift of bosses that have turned mentors, fathers and now destiny helpers. Beyond giving thanks, this has taught me perhaps the two biggest lessons I wish to take into 2019 going forward.

First, at the risk of being repetitive, I must keep working and remain faithful where God is nursing me right now while I wait for him to take me to where he’s planning to plant me. God used my experience and commitment during this waiting period to be the basis for the glowing recommendation I received. Imagine I was lazy and care-free about my work while bombarding God with prayers and firms with applications. That alone would have shut this door of opportunity when it opened. So no matter how small a thing I shall lay my hands to do, no matter how transient a responsibility is, I shall do it with the right attitude, giving it my all, knowing that God’s plans for me and maybe the whole world, is dependent on each step I take on that task.  

Secondly, we all look forward to that destiny helper that will swoop into our lives riding perhaps a G-Wagon or wearing some angelic drape, to bring that transformation we need in our lives and career. But the truth is, that destiny helper may just be someone we have been living with all our lives or since we started that job or internship or business. It may be our colleague or even employee or junior in the office. Just one word, one recommendation, one statement and our career or that goal is either made or marred. On the other hand, we may be that destiny helper to someone whose dream is dependent on that recommendation or goodwill from us. Will I, like my Boss be willing to give that recommendation, that help, that extra touch even if it doesn’t appear to serve my interest? 

I look forward to 2019 knowing the opportunity it’ll present to shape my future and that of many others day by day. 

For now, happy cheers to Mr SSO, the Boss for All Seasons and to the few out there like him, for the opportunity to be better, do greater and earn bigger. 

KIGAI MANDEY ZONTONG

Kigai is an Abuja based Legal Practitioner and Arbitrator. He can be reached through:

kigaizontong@gmail.com,       www.facebook.com/kigaiz, https://ng.linkedin.com/in/kigai-zontong-aciarb-uk-803626114

I'D NEVER MAKE IT TO 2019

It was that time of the year for me. Time to take stock. Sit by myself and reflect. And I didn't want to do it.  I did not have the mind. So I picked up my phone to go on William Uchemba's handle on IG or something. You know what we do to distract ourselves from life na. Anything but think about 2018. But before I could click on the instagram icon on my phone, I felt a tear trickling down my cheeks onto my phone screen.  I was too late.  I wiped them off immediately. But they continued strolling down my face. I lifted my chin upwards in a stupid attempt to have them return to the pit they came from. Still didn’t work. It was like the number, 2018, had triggered a water faucet in my body. It was just too much😫

 I knew the problem. Truth is I was too weak to admit it earlier. Maybe too ashamed to admit:
 I was tired... I am tired... Completely exhausted. 2018 took more than I had to give, more than I was ever willing to give. And I had not recovered.Was I Weak? Did it make sense that I just wanted to recover before facing the madness of a new year with its unreasonable expectations? I wanted to remain in 2018 small, just small Or would I be too late for 2019 by the time I recovered from the chaos of 2018? 2018 was just too much😫

How in God's name could a year not go according to any plan? I mean I didn’t have a lot of plans!  I was nowhere in the first 6months of the year. Absolutely nowhere. Instead, the faster I ran, the slower 2018 got. And when I couldn’t care less, it turned into an uncontrollable race car that almost gave me a heart attack. Everything I was pursuing in the first 7-8 months came in the space of days and I could barely breathe. I couldn’t handle it. I was always at extremes. Either laughing uncontrollably or crying so hard. Either very insecure or overly confident. Sometimes overwhelmed with peace but most times bedridden by anxiety.  Either too in love or completely fatigued by it. It was just too much 😫. . .

My back started to ache from sitting too long. I laid on my back with the tears now strolling into my ears. I remembered it all like yesterday. Only me got hired and resigned within 24 hours, lost serious documents--worth millions--that should have gotten me fired, and could not sleep for 3 days because of anxiety.  It was only when I took Habib yoghurt that I could sleep. I promise you it was not longer throat, it was a real medical condition😂  I remember the job applications and how my heart would sink from the rejections. I mean a girl can only take so many "Ls" in her life.  And then the confusion that followed. I remember the pain from losing money, from breaking my own heart. And yes I did, I really did break my own heart. 2018 was just too much 😫. And it took much more. But there were beautiful moments too. I remember mummy’s dance when the good news about our Opara came. Or watching my best friend kiss the love of her life. yuck. Or the exciting feeling of travelling thousands of miles pursuing my dreams and seeing my baby sister. Those moments, amongst many others, I can never forget. 

However, while I’m excited at the possibilities that simmer in 2019, I’m not in a hurry to say goodbye to 2018.  I’ll be foolish if I were. I made too many mistakes in 2018 and a new year does not automatically make me wiser. No new year new me nonsense this time. I tried it 2018, even posted slay debut picture on instagram 😂. It still did not work. Everything that happened in 2018 doesn’t vanish because of 2019. That’s not how life works.  2019 only exists because I went through 2018. And if I continue with this silly mentality of rushing into the new year a brand new person with 2000 resolutions I'll make the same mistakes over and over and over again. I'll be anxious about the same things over and over again. And though the years will change from 2018-2019-2020, I'll be stuck making the same mistakes--because I leave each year empty-handed, remembering the events but forgetting the lessons. I'd never make it to 2019.

So Ijeoma let's call a spade a spade. I wish you had more faith in 2018. Faith in yourself. Faith in God. I wished you prayed more and spoke to people less. You were always confused. I wish you were kinder to yourself. You are young and you will make mistakes. I wish you enjoyed the process, enjoyed the adventure rather than worry about things you couldn’t control. Worrying didn’t give you any more control.  I wish you weren’t so anxious and feeling you needed to help God do his part. You blew it. You pursued everything and got nothing. I wish you listened to God. You broke your own heart and you shouldn’t have. Most of the things you went through in 2018 were self-orchestrated. You felt you were more interested in your own success than God. You couldn't be more wrong.

In 2019, abeg let's agree not to do this again. There will be challenges. Accept it now. You will be uncertain about many things.  It's the truth. People will doubt you. but do not doubt yourself. Listen, do not be overwhelmed. Please don’t run mad like you did in 2018 😂. You are too old mbok! Pray and sleep. Trust God more.  I promise you your village people will leave you if you ignore them😂😂. And when your head begins to touch and you feel like your life is too slow, remember what Minika said, "Ijeoma, you are just right where you are supposed to be". So live a little.  Apply to become a cheerleader in school again. They have already rejected your first application 😂. 😂Keep applying, na them go tire last. This law you are studying is just a pot of beans with plantain back😂 My sister actually said, "Ijeoma, it is called plantain peel", it is plantain back joo, dont argue with a lawyer . Be happy.  Don’t walk around with the weight of the world on your shoulders. Do not usurp God's role. 

But I know you, you will not hear word. So just in case your village people are still on your matter 😂, let me tell you a secret for when the rollercoaster of 2019 begins. Let me tell you why you will still win like you always have. Why you still have an edge, even when 2019 will try like 2018 to take more than you have to give: if you went through 2018, 2017,2016,2015,2014… and did not die. Walahi, You cannot die again😂😂. HAPPY NEW YEAR!

VALIDATIONS

I want to start by asking you a question; `If something monumental happens in your life and you put it on the social media, take for instance Facebook, but nobody likes it or comments on it, did it really happen?’ I ask this, because I have seen people who had something great happen in their life, something worth celebrating which they actually celebrated and are happy about, but because they posted this thing on Facebook and nobody or very few people liked it and/or commented on it, they become so gloomy and sad almost as if that great thing never happened to them. This got me thinking about the fast-growing addiction and craving of we young people not just for social media validations, but societal attestation and approval.

OPERATION BLOW WAS A STUPID PLAN

Although, my story is not as exciting as the Green Arrow’s, I believe I started out like Oliver Queen this year. Maybe, not exactly to save Nigeria or even Port Harcourt, I needed to save myself. From what exactly? You see, I had just finished National Service and was plunged into unemployment. I am not even joking.  This was legit one of the craziest phases of my life. Guys, there was no law firm that I did not apply to in Abuja, even lagos sef.  I was so busy applying for jobs that you might as well say I was employed by unemployment itself 😔 Then, I started going around with folders too oo. Even with that, do you know that there were some firms that I went to with my CV, by the time I entered the office, I had to ask myself this one na kitchen abi na office? 😂😂. Nobody told me to carry my CV and run from those places. Those are the types of firms that you will be the one paying the owner salary😂😂.   But truthfully, the worst thing about the whole process was that most of the firms were not getting back to me. They initially weren’t even dignifying my application with a response. It was like I was applying to another universe. Please Guys, when we own our law firms in the future, can we not do this?  The least you can do is reply the applicant. A simple "your application was unsuccessful" would suffice. Why would you ignore my application abeg? Am I a ghost? 😂 Let me just tell you people the truth, "dat thing is rude, And Jesus is coming soon, you better repent"

A WORTHLESS CURRENCY: MONEY

Other than the fact that my name is Ijeoma Unachukwu, people seem to think that there are a lot of things not igbo about me. First, they say, "Ijeoma, how is a right handed Igbo girl like you only able to count money with her left hand?" I know right? How is that a thing sef? Apparently, my Igbo friends say it points to my grave disrespect for money.  They make it look a taboo, like when you collect something from an elder with your left hand.😂😂 Is it that deep?

When I look back, maybe they were right. Maybe I didn’t value money as much as I should have. Because I almost always had enough or knew the people that did. And as long as I was able to take care of myself, that was enough for me. But something changed this year. And it would have changed for anybody who started out this with year like I did: unemployed. All of a sudden Money had value. And this girl could miraculously count money with every part of her body including her toes sef.😂  Don’t get me wrong oo, I wasn’t hungry and begging. It was anything but that. There was just so much to do and  money felt like a great obstacle to doing them. Kai, money did me strong thing. I mean I was so worried I was having sleep disorders. I did not sleep for 3 good nights. Guys, it was only in this year I knew this saying was no joke: Them get some kind sickness wey only bank alert fit cure. Walahi, I was having a melt down.😞 So much worry, still no money. So  I told myself "Ijeoma, issa wrap! I'm not doing again. I don't have the money"

But one day as I desperately flipped through scripture to steady my mind, I saw an almost archaic verse that usually meant nothing to me. You cannot serve God and money at the same time. You will hate one and love the other. Stay with me, stay with me, I'm not about preaching.  I could see the over familiar stale words in black ink but for some reason, I could hear something more profound in my heart. It couldn’t be me he was talking to. Abi did anybody see me pursuing money, greedily or not paying my tithe?, 👀👀  As I tried to gloss over the passage again, I realized I was stuck. Maybe, there was more to this text. Maybe I didn’t have to be greedy or stingy to serve money. Maybe,  there was another group of people who still ingeniously served money: Most them products of their experiences, people who had gone through life managing money at every point. Maybe they had gone overboard and now money was managing their dreams. Worse of all, maybe they didn't know.

Now I’m sure you are saying, Ijeoma keep quiet joo, does that mean that money is somebody's god? But what makes a god a god mbok? Isn’t it the fact, that you let it dictate what you can or cannot do? Your capabilities and limitations?  Ok, let me explain. Asides from my recent weight gain,(please its not your business)  the only reason I am not dressed like the flash running up and down, is because God has placed a limitation on my speed. So despite all my appeals to God, I have to walk from point A to B like every other mortal in slow motion.  Why? because by God's design I don’t have the capacity to run like the flash. I just can’t do it because he says I can’t.  Now when you let the presence or otherwise of money dictate whether you can start a business, go to school or amount to anything in life, no be god be that?

 I know some of you are still thinking you are not a part of this group. But how many times have you let lack of money stop you from doing what you really want to do or pursuing a dream. How many business ideas have you let money kill? Dreams of furthering education massacred? Because each time you do this: let money tell you what you can or cannot have, you are no different...  drops mic

As the previous chairman of this covert money serving group,  adjusts my agbada, I feel like I still have to give you a brief profile, just in case you want to know what they really look like.  For these people eh, when they have money, they worry about losing it and don’t use it to pursue their dreams, and when they don’t have it, they worry about how to get it. In other words, they are too much of a boss, that money can't win with them. Their case is really in heaven. In my opinion, what they really serve is the presence or lack it.  And for some reason, when they don’t have it they feel paralyzed, like they can't do jack. So in reality, what they are saying is that the extent to which they can go in life is dependent on how much money they have in their wallet. Eventually, their sense of lack overwhelms them so much  that they despise God.

But can I say the truth? The thing is when you let money determine your potential in life, you forget  that most of the greatest people on earth used what we generally referred to as nothing to gain everything. I think it shows that perhaps the currency for your dreams may not be money. And maybe, just maybe, if you had the right mindset, what you have i.e, your determination and skill set, may just be enough to get you what you need which includes, money.  Selah. Abeg pause and think about this paragraph. Its deep

 I have said all these to say one thing. You may not have all the money in the world but you do have a choice. Its either you choose God or money. And if you really choose God to be your God, I’m sure you will realize that asides from being a speedster, there are really no limits. No impossibilities. So do you know what I do now, when I hear lack yelling so loud  in my heart trying to intimidate me or my dreams and I am tempted to worry about all the things I may never do or the heights I may never attain because I lack money, I remind my self of one thing, I serve God not money and then I continue on my course. Only God determines my limits and I will become every single thing he says I will become. So let me tell you the truth, Guys, we have to pursue our dreams.  Just start out, Money will never come until you do. 

However, I wish to proffer you a more superior and infallible currency. A currency that defiles all money, cash and cheque,  just because it can fetch you the world and a whole lot more: Faith, for with it, Everything is possible and that includes your dreams...

Never give up!

Thank you for reading. Please if this has helped you in any way, can you please share? Can you also comment on what money has stopped you from doing? and what you didn't let money stop you from doing. I know I would like to learn from you!

THE EXODUS 2

“Aunty you no dey see road”

“Ah ah, oga, I am sorry” I got so lost in thought that I bumped into a plantain chips hawker. He was so angry😡. It was almost like he wanted me dead instantly. And for some reason, instead of retaliating, I understood his plight.  It was a Nigerian thing. We all had something to be angry about. If it wasn’t the government, it was the bad roads or the super eagles who travelled all the way to Russia to "fall down" through out a world cup match.  Let's not even talk about NEPA abi PHCN, who refused to give us common light to watch the match sef😒